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Lizzy Borden Three years ago when I first got into the business, I was on a lot of drugs and I was thirty pounds overweight and Roger said that I was chunky. Then all you little internet geeks said that I was the ugliest girl in the business. Now you all can suck my pussy juice because I've lost thirty pounds and have been drug and alcohol free for two years. The only drug I do now is caffeine. I am a coffee addict, but that's it. So fuck off, I'm beautiful and skinny now.
Roger T. Pipe Is that it?
Lizzy Borden Yeah, for now.
Roger T. Pipe In my defense, you WERE chunky then.
Lizzy Borden I was.
Roger T. Pipe So I said you were, we're in agreement, why all the anger towards me?
Lizzy Borden It's just that I haven't done a movie in two years so some people still think I'm like that and I want you to tell them I'm not.
Roger T. Pipe So you and I are cool now?
Lizzy Borden We're cool, for now. What did you give my last movie?
Roger T. Pipe I don't remember.
Lizzy Borden You fucking liar. I think I hate you again.
Roger T. Pipe So for the record, you have lost thirty pounds and are clean now.
Lizzy Borden Yes I am, and I did it for me, not for people who talked shit about me. I did it for me and for Robert. We're getting married you know.
Roger T. Pipe When?
Lizzy Borden August 6th.
Roger T. Pipe Do you have the honeymoon planned?
Lizzy Borden Yes, we're going to Hawaii. I can't wait.
Roger T. Pipe What kind of wedding are Rob Black and Lizzy Borden going to have?
Lizzy Borden It's going to be a huge church wedding..
Roger T. Pipe That should be interesting. Now that the air is clear, can we start the interview?
Lizzy Borden Go ahead.
Roger T. Pipe Tell us a little bit about your background. Where are you from?
Lizzy Borden Orange County.
Roger T. Pipe Really, where?
Lizzy Borden Anaheim and Huntington Beach, I went back and forth.
Roger T. Pipe I live in Orange County.
Lizzy Borden Do you like it?
Roger T. Pipe I love it.
Lizzy Borden I used to love it, but it's strange. After living in the Valley, I feel safer up there than when I go down to Orange County, I don't know why.
Roger T. Pipe What were you like growing up?
Lizzy Borden I was very shy and very insecure. I came from a broken family. My stepfather was an alcoholic who was very abusive towards my mother. He didn't accept me. I went through a lot of shit.
Roger T. Pipe At what point did you look to the adult industry as a career?
Lizzy Borden I was working at Disneyland for a while, but it got to the point where I was so unhappy. I felt like I had to be a different person just to make friends. People would ask if I was a virgin and I would say yes just to fit in. I was afraid of what they would think. I just got sick of being someone other than I was. So, I started stripping, met Jill Kelly, fell in love with her and I got into porn from there. I loved it because I didn't have to hide who I was.
Roger T. Pipe Did you meet Jill in a club where you were dancing?
Lizzy Borden Yeah, she was feature dancing. She was the first girl I ever had a crush on and I still do have a crush on her if you want to know the truth.
Roger T. Pipe How long were dancing before you made a movie?
Lizzy Borden About four months.
Roger T. Pipe What was your first movie?
Lizzy Borden My first movie was for Tight Ends, with Tony Montana who now has HIV. The scene freaked me out and I can't even remember the name of the movie. I was so scared. A lot of people are going to think this is weird, but I made my mom go with me.
Roger T. Pipe Really?
Lizzy Borden Yeah. She didn't watch the scene, but she was there. She cried the whole way there and tried to talk me out of it, but I knew that if I didn't try it, I would regret it for the rest of my life.
Roger T. Pipe Did you do that movie as Lizzy Borden?
Lizzy Borden No, I was Mia Mikels. You remember her Rog, big fat Mia Mikels that everyone loves to rip apart on the internet.
Roger T. Pipe Where did Lizzy Borden come from?
Lizzy Borden Robert gave me that name because I love horror movies.
Roger T. Pipe So you did your first scene was with Tony, how was he to work with?
Lizzy Borden I'm surprised I stayed in the industry after that.
Roger T. Pipe Why?
Lizzy Borden He's a good guy, but he's really out there. He's crazy. I can't explain it, but if I can go through that, I can go through anything.
Roger T. Pipe Were you nervous?
Lizzy Borden I almost peed my pants. I was SO nervous.
Roger T. Pipe Was that an anal scene?
Lizzy Borden No anal that time.
Roger T. Pipe When you were done with that first scene, did you know that you wanted to do more or did you need some time to think it over?
Lizzy Borden I took a few weeks, but decided that I couldn't just judge things on one scene. I did some internet stuff, some girl/girl stuff that I didn't like at all. I went back to doing scenes, some bad some good and eventually, I ended up here.
Roger T. Pipe How did you end up at Extreme?
Lizzy Borden Luciano used to perform as Mike Long. We worked together a few times for Metro. He called me up one night to tell me he was signing a deal with Extreme Associates. I was worried, because when I first got into the business, everyone told me never to work for Extreme, never work for Rob Black. We went out celebrating that night and the following Monday he called me to ask me to do a BJ with him for an Extreme movie. I said fine as long as I don't have to meet Rob Black. Of course I get there and the first person I meet is Rob. It turns out that he is just the sweetest guy and I can't understand why everyone hates him.
Roger T. Pipe How long before you signed a contract with Extreme?
Lizzy Borden I guess Rob saw something in me because he put me under contract. He told me I had to lose at least twenty pounds, get a nose job and a boobjob and all that. The day I went in to sign my contract, I had no make up on, shorts, boots a tank top, I looked like hell. I get to the office and they told me I had to do an anal scene. To do an anal scene you have to not eat for a couple of days, really prepare. The next thing I know, I'm out in the wilderness, shitting all over Tommy. I had to go into the woods with bottled water and towels to clean it all up. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. It was the only time I've ever worked with Tom Byron.
Roger T. Pipe The only time?
Lizzy Borden There was this other time, great story. I was doing Terrors from the Clit and that Chris Cannon guy, fucking asshole, was fucking me in the ass. He came too soon, came in my ass. Tommy was downstairs and had to come up and jerk off on my face for the pop shot. What do you think about that?
Roger T. Pipe I think it's good to be Tom Byron and that you're ass is just too tight and makes people cum too fast.
Lizzy Borden You know it.
Roger T. Pipe Was the scene with Tom your first anal scene?
Lizzy Borden No, I had done anal before. The first time was awful, it hurt and I cried. I did anal with Luciano and his dick is good for that. There were a few others before that. I only did about six movies before I went to Extreme.
Roger T. Pipe So they signed you under contract, changed your name and shortly after that you kind of retired.
Lizzy Borden You know, the drugs I was doing helped me become a different person and perform for the camera. After I got off drugs, I started freaking out doing scenes. I had ideas for movies and wanted to write and direct. Robert and I actually wrote Tiffany's movie "Asswoman in Wonderland" She takes the credit, but we wrote that. I wrote "Acid Sex" and then Robert let me direct on my own.
Roger T. Pipe About how many movies were you in total?
Lizzy Borden About fifteen, not counting non-sex roles.
Roger T. Pipe If you had to pick the best, what would it be?
Lizzy Borden Even though I shit all over Tommy, I would say 'Pornographer' was the best. Then 'Terrors from the Clit' and 'Slap'er in the Crap'er.'
Roger T. Pipe What was the first movie you directed?
Lizzy Borden 'House of Whores' with Ashlyn Gere and Jasmin St. Claire.
Roger T. Pipe I saw that one.
Lizzy Borden Did you like it?
Roger T. Pipe You haven't read the review?
Lizzy Borden I can't get to the site. After I read your review of 'Cocktails' I tried to go back, but I can't.
Roger T. Pipe Well, House of Whores was good, I really liked Extreme Monique.
Lizzy Borden That is the one review I read that you liked.
Roger T. Pipe How many movies have you directed?
Lizzy Borden About twenty now.
Roger T. Pipe And the best would be?
Lizzy Borden I'm proud of everything, but I am really proud of 'Purity and Innocence.' Getting Kristi Myst to push her limits was great.
Roger T. Pipe Wasn't Ashlyn in that?
Lizzy Borden She was, but she didn't finish. We paid her for the whole thing, but she never finished it. That movie is not the way it was supposed to be. Ashlyn totally fucked us so we had to revamp the script. Considering all the work it took to revamp on the fly, I am really proud of how it turned out.
Roger T. Pipe So those are you favorites? Any others?
Lizzy Borden Actually, I want to tell you my New Year's Resolution.
Roger T. Pipe OK.
Lizzy Borden It has to do with you. After 'Cocktails' and the reviews and stuff, I have decided that it's time for a new Lizzy Borden. From here on out, you are going to see hot sex, which I know you like without the gross stuff. Then in other movies, I'm going to be as gross as ever so I can give something to everyone.
Roger T. Pipe I'll be watching for that. Let's get a few stats, how tall are you?
Lizzy Borden Five eight.
Roger T. Pipe Measurements?
Lizzy Borden 34D-26-32.
Roger T. Pipe You're pretty skinny.
Lizzy Borden Compared to what I used to be yeah. What do you think?
Roger T. Pipe You look hot.
Lizzy Borden Thank you.
Roger T. Pipe But I think you looked hot chunky.
Lizzy Borden Don't say that!
Roger T. Pipe OK, I take it back.
Lizzy Borden Good.
Roger T. Pipe You were talking about things that are said on the internet, so let's go back to that a bit. One thing that you hear on the net all the time is that Lizzy Borden doesn't direct her own movies, that Rob Black does them for her.
Lizzy Borden Really? People say that? That's so funny. Like Rob has time to do that. He has to sit in the office and run thing because stupid people can't do a thing for themselves. He works so hard in the office, he wouldn't have time to direct his own movies, let alone mine. So anyone who thinks he directs my movies can fuck themselves. If you want to come by my set and see what I do, that's fine. You come on my set Rog, you tell these fuckers. I hate that.
Roger T. Pipe So, just to be clear, you direct your own movies?
Lizzy Borden Yeah I do. Why would I want someone else to direct my movies? I don't even like to hear his input when he shoots camera for me. Sometimes, we end up one scene short and I could put in something that we have waiting to go into a movie, but then it wouldn't be my movie and I would be lying to the people. I won't do that.
Roger T. Pipe I'll come to a set sometime and document it for the non-believers.
Lizzy Borden You do that.
Roger T. Pipe Let's talk a little bit about this wrestling thing. You're becoming quite a character in the wrestling world.
Lizzy Borden Yes. I've been in quite a few of the magazines and it's keeping me pretty busy. We're really growing.
Roger T. Pipe What is your role in the XPW?
Lizzy Borden I play the boss' wife who loves to wreak havoc. We are the most hated people, I'm a total cunt bitch but also a whiner. I love to start trouble, but then I run to Rob when things go wrong. I interfere in all the matches and I valet for The Messiah.
Roger T. Pipe I saw one of your shows, you were a bitch.
Lizzy Borden Thank you, I try really hard.
Roger T. Pipe Are you a bitch?
Lizzy Borden No, I'm really a nice person, but it's fun to be a bitch in the ring. Don't get me wrong, I can be a bitch. If someone hurts Robert, I can be a huge bitch. Mostly, I'm the person that everyone comes to with their problems so I get sucked into all the little drama.
Roger T. Pipe Unless somebody crosses you, you're nice?
Lizzy Borden You know, it takes a lot to piss me off. I take too much shit sometimes, but I reach a point where I just blow up.
Roger T. Pipe What about the team you have at Extreme now? Any thoughts on them?
Lizzy Borden I don't want to start any drama, but there are a lot of people at Extreme who don't respect Robert and Tommy enough. They're young and they think they can just do it their own way. There aren't a lot of people who could do what they did and make a company work like this one has.
Roger T. Pipe When you were performing, did you have any favorite performers to work with?
Lizzy Borden I liked working with girls. I always wanted to work with Jill. This may sound mean, but Tiffany had really bad breath. She smoked a lot of cigarettes so I didn't like to kiss her. But I liked to lick her ass. She does have a nice ass and it tasted good.
Roger T. Pipe Did you have any favorite guys to work with?
Lizzy Borden I didn't really work with a lot of guys so I'm not going to be able to comment on that. I can tell you one thing, I love Robert's cock.
Roger T. Pipe Did you have any really bad experiences?
Lizzy Borden There were a couple of people I hated. That dickhead with the long hair, Alex Sanders! I did a blowjob with him for All Good Video, that fucking asshole. I could stab that mother fucker, I hate him. He thinks he's God. Go fuck yourself. If it wasn't for the girls in this industry the guys would be nothing. They need us to fuck.
Roger T. Pipe A lot of women think Alex is good looking.
Lizzy Borden He's ugly. He's like a little troll, an ugly troll.
Roger T. Pipe And a lot of girls think he has a really big dick.
Lizzy Borden (She laughs.) No one thinks that. I think he's gross. He has no personality. He's like a wall. I'd rather masturbate or do a midget before I would do him.
Roger T. Pipe But would you do a porn critic?
Lizzy Borden Before Alex, fuck yeah, you over him any day.
Roger T. Pipe Do you think the people you grew up with would be shocked to see you now?
Lizzy Borden A lot of them have seen me and I've lost a few friends over it. One of my very best friends doesn't speak to me now. She thinks everyone in the industry is on drugs and is scum. A lot people are on drugs, that's true, but a lot of them have gone through a lot of trauma like me and are looking for something. I was fortunate enough not to be molested, but I was emotionally abused. A lot of my friends look down on me. The guys mostly think it's cool, but the girls think I'm a whore.
Roger T. Pipe How do you deal with that?
Lizzy Borden I just don't talk to anyone from my past. If they can't accept me for who I am, I don't have time for them.
Roger T. Pipe Probably a lot of guys are wishing they knew you in high school.
Lizzy Borden I was a virgin until right before I graduated high school.
Roger T. Pipe How did that happen?
Lizzy Borden It was my boyfriend on the day before my eighteenth birthday.
Roger T. Pipe You were old.
Lizzy Borden I know. I was a late bloomer. I had really low self esteem, so it was hard.
Roger T. Pipe Was it a good experience at least?
Lizzy Borden No.
Roger T. Pipe But it's gotten better?
Lizzy Borden Oh yeah, sex has gotten way better. I'm more into it now than ever. It's funny because I love to get choked and slapped, but Rob doesn't like to do that anymore. He's all wanting to make love and shit. I want to be fucked dammit.
Roger T. Pipe What is the best way for people to get in touch with you?
Lizzy Borden Through our web site, www.extremeassocaites.com I've been checking out our message board a lot lately and I like the feedback.
Roger T. Pipe I saw some people upset about Cocktails.
Lizzy Borden I know, it was hard. I got girls who said they would do this and that, we put stuff on the box, then the girls flaked. We only have a few seconds to get them swallowing and it's not like we can re-shot that moment. I'm going to have to be a lot tougher on the girls next time because I got fucked over and ended up lying to the fans on the box.
Roger T. Pipe But the box was done before you didn't lie on purpose.
Lizzy Borden No, but still, I don't like when shit like that happens. I care about the fans, so I'm going to be a bigger cunt next time.
Roger T. Pipe I've been on that board, you all talk shit about me.
Lizzy Borden No, really? Who?
Roger T. Pipe Some fans and Alek, talking some smack about a review.
Lizzy Borden Of what, Slap Happy?
Roger T. Pipe That's the one.
Lizzy Borden I haven't read those reviews, I need to check them out. You didn't like it?
Roger T. Pipe Nah, I like girls. I don't want to see them beat up.
Lizzy Borden Awww, you're a nice guy.
Roger T. Pipe Yeah, let's cum all over their faces, that's nice and romantic.
Lizzy Borden You don't like any violence at all?
Roger T. Pipe Not with sex. I love sex and I love violence, but not together as stroke material.
Lizzy Borden I'm doing this movie, 'Forced Entry, that you will just rip apart. It's six scenes of pure rape. No pleasure at all. It's based on Richard Ramirez. The guys rape and kill the girls. We're actually trying to get in touch with him actually. There is a scene with Luciano fucking a girl, as he kills her, he looks at the camera and says 'that's for you Richard, you're my idol.'
Roger T. Pipe Sounds like something different.
Lizzy Borden I'm not saying I promote that kind of behavior and I am going to give some of the money to the victims of violent crime. Violent sex turns me on, but you want to know something that turns me on even more, late night soft core movies on like HBO. Those things make me horny and don't know why. I love girls tits and mouths, so a lot of my girls are big titted because that just turns me on.
Roger T. Pipe Since you're a director, who do you like to hire for scenes?
Lizzy Borden I love Kristi, she is always willing to give one hundred percent. I didn't originally like Taylor St. Claire because we had some drama but I'm beginning to really like her and she has great tits. Jewel De'Nyle is a great performer. Jessica is great. I loved to shoot Monique and I'm going to bring her back. Her body is so tight and she's such an animal. She is the only girl I know who just really loves to fuck. She will fuck even if she's not getting paid, that's how much she loves to fuck.
Roger T. Pipe Can I come to the set next time you shoot her?
Lizzy Borden Sure. I'm going to be shooting her again for probably three or four movies. I just love her.
Roger T. Pipe What about some girls who maybe weren't fun to work with?
Lizzy Borden Jasmin St. Claire. She was the worst. I had to baby her. She wants this, she wants that. Angelica Sin was bad too. She had to have a certain kind of water. We have Evian on our sets, but no she had to have distilled water. I sent someone around to a dozen stores, but they couldn't find any so she's like :Fine, I'll just drink what you have." What a fucking bitch. She wanted to do a scene with her husband and they show up fighting. They were fighting through the whole scene. I never want to shoot a couple again. Couples are the worst. I always thought it would be better to work with couples. If me and Rob did scenes, we would be winning award every year. You can't fake that kind of heat.
Roger T. Pipe You've done the directing thing, the wrestling thing and you're getting married. This is going to be a busy year for you.
Lizzy Borden Really busy. Rob wants to start having kids soon, but I'm not ready.
Roger T. Pipe Having kids? You're going to have children with the devil.
Lizzy Borden He's not the devil.
Roger T. Pipe Anything else?
Lizzy Borden I don't want people talking bad about Robert any more, I'll kill them.
Roger T. Pipe Kill them?
Lizzy Borden Well not kill them, you know what I mean.
Roger T. Pipe Because killing is wrong.
Lizzy Borden So very wrong, but I will knee them. Knee them really hard.
Roger T. Pipe How are the wedding plans going?
Lizzy Borden You know Rob, he keeps putting things off, but I'm forcing him to plan.
Roger T. Pipe Are you going to have a real wedding dress.
Lizzy Borden Yes, it's even going to be white. We're getting married in a Catholic church.
Roger T. Pipe Is he physically able to set foot in a church without being invited?
Lizzy Borden That's vampires you ass.
Roger T. Pipe Tell me you aren't going to invite Zupko. He'll end up peeing on a crucifix or something.
Lizzy Borden If Zupko comes, he's going to have to be restrained. There will be no peeing at my wedding.
Roger T. Pipe Then you're going to have kids?
Lizzy Borden Rob wants one soon, a boy.
Roger T. Pipe Why a boy?
Lizzy Borden Boys are better. They can play football and baseball. Rob wants to coach football and all that. Also if we have a girl, I'm afraid she'll turn out like me.
Roger T. Pipe We can't forget to mention that Rob is running for mayor of Los Angeles.
Lizzy Borden I'm going to be a political wife.
Roger T. Pipe You're going to have a lot of microphones shoved in your face.
Lizzy Borden I know, and I'm going to have to learn to be careful what I say.
Roger T. Pipe Why?
Lizzy Borden I say fuck a lot, and cunt and bitch. I'm not sure how most people feel about that. I have to watch my language. His mom is really helping me. She even taught me how to set a proper table this weekend.
Roger T. Pipe Do you think he has a chance of winning?
Lizzy Borden Yes and no. Yes if he really puts his best effort into it and no if he just says fuck it and coasts. I think he has a chance because he's young and energetic. A lot more young people are getting involved after the Gore and Bush election.
Roger T. Pipe So you're taking this seriously?
Lizzy Borden Very. I'm going to get some nicely tailored suits and hide my cleavage.
Roger T. Pipe But you have cleavage that needs to be shown.
Lizzy Borden Well take some pictures and you can look at it any time you want. Will you be coming to the debates?
Roger T. Pipe I will try. Politics is not my arena any more, but it should be interesting.
Lizzy Borden Rob wants to legalize gambling.
Roger T. Pipe I'd vote for that.
Lizzy Borden So you'll vote for Rob?
Roger T. Pipe I can't vote.
Lizzy Borden Why?
Roger T. Pipe He's running in Los Angeles, I'm in Orange County.
Lizzy Borden Oh that's right. I thought we were going to find out your deep dark secret past or something.
Roger T. Pipe It will be fun to watch.
Lizzy Borden He's going to get a big billboard with his face that says Rob for Mayor.
Roger T. Pipe That's going to scare a lot of children.
Lizzy Borden (She laughs) You be nice.
Roger T. Pipe Anything more you want to cover?
Lizzy Borden Did you know that Rob has a booger fascination?
Roger T. Pipe I'm afraid to ask what you mean.
Lizzy Borden He likes to pick boogers and flick them at me, and fart on me. So you know what I did?
Roger T. Pipe Again, fear comes to the forefront.
Lizzy Borden I had gas so bad. I farted under the covers and it smelled so bad, he almost got sick.
Roger T. Pipe And this concludes our interview..
Lizzy Borden No, wait let me tell you something else. I shit so big the last time I took a dump. It was as big as my arm and we had to take it out of the toilet because it wouldn't flush.
Roger T. Pipe You don't say.
Lizzy Borden I have a picture of it, I'll send it to you. It was so bad, I had to put my leg on the counter to get it out. I thought Rob was going to have to dig it out with a spoon.
Roger T. Pipe Can we go eat now?
Lizzy Borden Yeah, let's go have lunch, maybe some chocolate?
Roger T. Pipe Chocolate yeah. You're done performing in movies right?
Lizzy Borden I'll do non sex roles, but I don't want to fuck on camera any more. I don't like licking pussy and I don't like girls licking my pussy. Pussies are dirty.
Roger T. Pipe They are not.
Lizzy Borden Some girls don't clean Rog, it's so gross.
Roger T. Pipe Again with the lunch, maybe a seafood buffet?
Lizzy Borden You know the only girl I like to fuck is Jessica Darlin. She has the cleanest pussy and the cleanest ass. I am going to do a scene with two girls that starts in Heaven and ends up in Hell. It's going to be hot.
Roger T. Pipe That reminds me, you played God in a movie recently.
Lizzy Borden I did and Rob played the Devil in Soul Survivor. Oh shit, did I just spit on you?
Roger T. Pipe Either that or Zupko is up above reminding me what he thinks of my Anal Ball review.
Lizzy Borden Did you like me as God?
Roger T. Pipe That was very good dialog by both of you. Are you nominated for any AVN Awards?
Lizzy Borden Cocktails got nominated for most disturbing scene or something.
Roger T. Pipe Do you think you'll win?
Lizzy Borden I don't care. We're boycotting it all anyway. We are going to do our own awards this year. Where you can't buy awards or suck people off for them. It will really represent the fans and the real reviewers like you.
Roger T. Pipe And you'll have awards for best reviewer?
Lizzy Borden Sure.
Roger T. Pipe So I have to bribe you now?
Lizzy Borden No, no more bribing, but no more fat jokes from you.
Roger T. Pipe We have come full circle. I never called you fat.
Lizzy Borden Chunky.
Roger T. Pipe You even said you were chunky, so what's the beef?
Lizzy Borden But I look good now?
Roger T. Pipe Yes, I told you, you look very slim now.
Lizzy Borden Just make sure you put that in there because I want people to know and feel stupid. Some of them even called me trailer trash.
Roger T. Pipe That's not always a bad thing.
Lizzy Borden Bull shit.
Roger T. Pipe No, trailer girls can be sexy.
Lizzy Borden You're high.
Roger T. Pipe You show up in pants like that and say I'm high?
Lizzy Borden You don't like my pants do you?
Roger T. Pipe They look like goat legs.
Lizzy Borden Fuck you, (she laughs) you and Messiah. He calls them Abominable Snowman pants. But I like them, I want people to notice them.
Roger T. Pipe In that case, may I make a suggestion?
Lizzy Borden Please.
Roger T. Pipe You're wearing a top that shows that much cleavage, so no sane, straight man will ever get as far as the pants.
Lizzy Borden I'll keep that in mind.
Roger T. Pipe Put a sign on your boobs that says "please look at my pants. " Do you have anything more to say to anyone?
Lizzy Borden That's about it.
Roger T. Pipe OK then.
Lizzy Borden No wait, I want to say this, with all sincerity. I love Rog. Now that he says I'm skinny.
Roger T. Pipe You didn't like me yesterday though.
Lizzy Borden That's because you come to the booth and don't talk to me.
Roger T. Pipe Pardon me? You've stood me up how many times for interviews?
Lizzy Borden You just have to grab me by the arm and tell me we're doing it.
Roger T. Pipe I'll keep that in mind.
Lizzy Borden Did I tell you my Rodney Moore story?
Roger T. Pipe We're not done?
Lizzy Borden Not yet. Jim South is a piece of shit.
Roger T. Pipe That's the Rodney Moore story?
Lizzy Borden That's the start of it. Jim was supposed to be my agent and he sent me to Rodney. I go to this house and I was scared. I wanted to leave, but Jim said I couldn't leave. I was supposed to do one scene, but ended up doing two. I hated it, but since my agent said I had to stay, I felt I had to. I hate Jim and I hate Rodney. He's a dirty fucking scumbag. That scene haunts me to this day.
Roger T. Pipe Is there anyone else you don't like?
Lizzy Borden That other guy who pretends he's an agent.
Roger T. Pipe Regan Senter?
Lizzy Borden Yeah, that's him. I saw him a while ago and he said he could get me work. I told him who I was and that I don't do movies any more. He said "You should do what you do best, suck cock." Fuck him, the lame ass little troll.
Roger T. Pipe Did you do one of his compliance videos?
Lizzy Borden Fuck no, I wouldn't touch that piece of shit. And Roy Karch. I was at Jim's office, you know how you just go there and sit. Roy comes in and we go to the back to take pictures. So I take the pictures and he starts taking his pants down. I asked him what he was doing and he said "You have to suck my cock if you want to work." I told him I don't do that. He said "You'll never get anywhere in this business." So ha-ha Roy, fuck you. Look where I am you piece of shit.
Roger T. Pipe Let's sum up the Lizzy Borden hit list.
Lizzy Borden Roy Karch, Jim South, Rodney Moore, Alex Sanders, and Alex's girlfriend is fucking horse faced cunt, what's her name Sid Vicious?
Roger T. Pipe Sid Deuce.
Lizzy Borden Whatever. She paid me to do a movie and it took me over two weeks to get paid, fucking cunt.
Roger T. Pipe Anyone who used to work for you?
Lizzy Borden Jasmin St. Claire is an unmerciful cunt. She said everyone in the industry is a piece of shit. Ashlyn Gere kind of screwed us over and Jon Dough is a fucking limp dicked drug addict. It took us three days to shoot that scene with him and Iroc. That's about it. Everyone has been OK.
Roger T. Pipe (Thomas Zupko walks into the room.)What about this guy?
Lizzy Borden Zupko? I actually like Thomas Zupko. Believe it or not, I really like him. Even though he won't give me a part in his movie and is always yelling at me.
Roger T. Pipe So can we say good bye now?
Lizzy Borden If you take some pictures of me to show people I'm not fat any more.
Roger T. Pipe Deal. Thanks Lizzy.
Lizzy Borden Thank you Rog, I love you.
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